beanski

another fascinating post brought to you by yours truly

I'm going to get the computer room cleaned up enough to sit there and look at pictures. Today. Or maybe tomorrow.  Surely by Cameron's birthday party on Saturday. Perhaps then I'll have something to post. I find these moderately entertaining because I can sort of guess what kind of person you are by what you like to watch. And eat.

THREE NAMES I GO BY
1. Mama
2. Beandawg
3. Beaner

THREE JOBS I HAVE HAD IN MY LIFE
1. Lifeguard
2. Chemistry stockroom attendant
3. Software engineer

THREE PLACES I HAVE LIVED
1. International Falls, MN
2. St. Paul, MN
3. Duluth, MN
(boy am I adverturous or what?)

THREE TV SHOWS THAT I WATCH
1. Project Runway
2. Top Chef
3. Dora the Exploder Explorer

THREE PLACES I HAVE BEEN
1. Paris, France
2. St. Maarten
3. Playa del Carmen, Mexico

THREE PLACES I WANT TO GO
1. Hawaii
2. New Zealand
3. Wine Country

THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS
1. Guacamole
2. Pizza
3. Chocolate

THREE THINGS I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO
1. Cameron's first birthday
2. Being done painting our house
3. Vacation

THREE ANIMALS WHO I HAVE BEEN FRIENDS WITH
1. Zeke
2. Simon
3. Sasha

THREE THINGS I AM REALLY SCARED OF
1. Snakes
2. Leaving my kids with no mother
3. Something bad happening to my kids

THREE FAVORITE BOOKS
1. The Harry Potter series
2. Cavalier and Clay
3. The Baby Whisperer

THREE FAVORITE BANDS/SINGERS
1. Wilco
2. Neko Case
3. Elliott Smith

THREE FAVORITE MOVIES
1. Dogma
2. The Big Lebowski
3. High Fidelity

THREE FAVORITE DRINKS
1. Wine
2. Diet Coke
3. Bell's Two Hearted Ale

THREE THINGS I FIND MOST ATTRACTIVE IN A GUY
1. Patience
2. Sense of Humor
3. Eyes

THREE THINGS I COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT
1. The fam, all of the crazy fam
2. M&Ms
3. My iPhone

party planner

I set sort of unrealistic expectations for my kid's birthday parties when Renee had her first birthday. I think I forgot that someday she was going to turn two and then when she turned two I swore that I wasn't going to go crazy and I was going to keep it low-key. And then I went crazy. 

Then I had another baby and GOOD LORD that is an awful lot of birthday party planning.

But in a good way.

Because I LOVE doing it. I get all of these ideas floating around in my brain and I lay awake at night thinking about it. I scour etsy looking for inspiration, do random googling like "activities for first birthday party" and sit at the computer for hours coordinating the invitations with the thank-you cards with the decorations. I make banners and cakes and personalized stickers. Somedays I think should have been a party planner because it really is one of the few things that I really love.

I'm eye deep in birthday planning right now because my baby? He turns one next week. Sniff, sniff. Me hurting my back has set me back (no pun intended) but I made a vow today to follow through on my plans. My husband can try to talk me into ordering pizzas and buying a cake but I am just not made that way and I would be sad on his first birthday. I want to be happy on his first birthday. But I'm going to be sad because you know, WHERE DID MY BABY GO?

What do you do for birthday parties? Low-key? All out? Just family? Where do you find your inspiration?

Here's a peek of Cam's 1st birthday - the invitation, which I ordered from annoncingyou on etsy:
 

tft: grocery budget directly to garbage can

I've fallen into a trap I swore I wouldn't fall into: I cook three meals almost every night.

One for Cameron, one for Renee and one for us.

Cameron's is because he is Mr. Sensitive and I can't give him dairy or really anything at all without him flipping out and being awake all night trying to fart. I'm fine with making him something because he sleeps if I keep to what works and that sleep is worth anything to me.

I know it is a bad idea to make something special for Renee and I know that is one of the reasons why I'm a raging lunatic but I don't know what to do about it. She doesn't eat much of anything and what she will eat, I will not eat. Well, I would but then the 20 pounds I would have to lose would turn to 30 and Lord knows the 20 is going to be hard enough to lose.

When I find the energy to care enough to try to lose it.

But that day is not today and probably not tomorrow either.

I don't care.

I guarantee we throw away at least half of the food we buy each month and I am SICK OF IT.

Tell me, what do your kids eat? What sort of portions? Do you really starve them until they eat last night's broccoli? Or is that one of those things the hardasses say they do because it makes them feel powerful when in reality they are suckers just like me? Do you put a fruit, vegetable, protein, carb and dairy on every plate for every meal and do they ever eat it?

I obsess about balancing their meals and it is making me crazy. And poor. Because I throw it all away.

1: already not according to plan

I've been planning on doing NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) for a while. You know, where I try to come up with something entertaining to say for thirty days in a row? Yeah that one. I'd find you a link about it but that is too much work right now. I had a plan for today's post. And tomorrow's.

Then I went to pick up a laundry basket this morning and I felt a pop and the spreading of some seriously burning pain and my back is in SHAMBLES. I am TWENTY-NINE YEARS OLD and I can't walk. Why is this happening to me?

A trip to the ER where I cried every time I tried to move and a few Loritabs (is that how you spell it?) later and I'm still barely functioning. And coming up with something witty and entertaining is sort of outside of my very incoherent brain.

I reckon I'll have a few days to come up with something good though. Perfectly good vacation days that will be spent chewing painkillers in my bed trying to work up the courage and strength to take a shower. 

Have I mentioned I am TWENTY-NINE YEARS OLD? I can only say that for another couple of months and you bet your ass I'm going to say it a lot. People in their twenties should not hurt their backs.

Thanks Mom and Dad for bailing me out. You should have heard how hard I started crying the minute I heard my mom's voice. There is just something about needing your Mommy when you're hurt and I'm so lucky mine always comes running when I need her. So incredibly lucky. 

i'm thinking that they're going as bubbles for halloween

I spent the last week freaking out that Cameron had The Swine Flu. Some dude I work with's kid had The Swine Flu and on the day I found out about that daycare called and my kid started a five day run of 103 temps. I know it's called H1N1. I don't know why they changed the name, I liked The Swine Flu better. I don't care if it wasn't "technically" correct. Anyways then the rash started yesterday and I kicked myself in the head for freaking out about The Swine Flu because Roseola never crossed my mind and Renee was the EXACT same age when she had the EXACT same thing happen to her.

My goal was this weekend for having Halloween costumes purchased and/or assembled and I'm totally blaming The Swine Flu for my failure to meet that goal. The only idea I could come up with over the weekend was The Bubble I want to float around each of us for the winter.

I'd sort of like for them to come as a pair because I'm a cheeseball and know that next year she'll want to be something obnoxious like, well, DORA. She still doesn't really GET Halloween. I only have two ideas so far.

• Dora and Boots
• Chewbacca and Yoda

What are your kids going as for Halloween? Do you have any ideas for me?

Boo at the Zoo is next weekend, I have to hurry.

the 'playground'

This is just one of the [many] reasons we are so lucky.

The only real downside to us moving was losing our playground two blocks down the road. Renee missed it. She talked about it all of the time and was never satisfied when we took her to the playgrounds in our new neighborhood.

She sat by the window ALL afternoon watching the man put the 'playground' together. She kept saying, "I want to go see him. I want to go play on it." After many hours of waiting I took her outside. She looked at it shyly with this little grin that clearly said "Can you even believe this shit?"

Then she ran over and tried EVERY SINGLE gadget on the thing. I won't easily forget the wonder in her eyes. So innocent and pure and just plain excited.
 
 
 
 
And you can see in Cam's ten month post that he loved it too. Spoiled? Lucky, I think.

i'd like to buy a vowel

The anticipation is KILLING me. My long-time friend Davina is appearing on the Season Premiere of Wheel of Fortune on Monday night and if I know Davina it just HAS to be good. Like the greatest thing to ever happen to me. So set up your DVRs folks, even if you've never met her, it will be totally worth it to hear her say "Pat, I'd like to buy a vowel." If she doesn't say it all of my hopes and dreams will be shattered. GO DAVINA!

give the geek a chance.

I have a confession. I work with computers for a living and they pay me a hefty salary to do so.

The funny thing is: I know nothing about them.

I know a good deal about writing software and building webpages and architecting solutions to be reusable, maintainable and generally totally awesome {SNORE}.

I don't know shit about hardware.

So when we moved and I hooked up my computer and realized that it wasn't the USB hub or the computer or the power supply that was making it so that my external hard-drive wasn't recognized by the computer, I wept. I thought about Cameron's first months of life and how I had nothing to show for them. There were exactly TWO MONTHS that I didn't have backed up and they just happened to be the first two months of my baby's life.

I kicked myself about three thousand times in the head because I KNOW BETTER. I WORK WITH COMPUTERS FOR A LIVING. I KNOW THEY FAIL.

It sat on my desk for a few weeks mocking me. I was totally scared to have someone look at it and tell me that it was going to cost thousands of dollars because I WAS WILLING TO PAY FOR IT. That's the crazy part. He's my son and I DIDN'T HAVE A PICTURE OF HIS FIRST WEEK OF LIFE.

In an act of desparation I took it to the Geek Squad. And when I met my nine foot tall geek, I was smitten. He offered to bust it open to check the USB adapter because sometimes they go bad. He told me how this NEVER happens and that most of the time people end up paying to have their data recovered in an air tight room. Then he told me about the average cost being in the seven hundred dollar range. I gazed into his eyes and held tight to my faith in my geek. Then he went over and started HAMMERING on my hard-drive, got it open and plugged it in. AND HE COULD SEE THE FILES.

Then I kissed his feet (I couldn't reach his lips he was NINE FEET TALL, remember?) and promised to have his babies.

After that I went home and backed up every fricking file under the sun TWICE on my brand, new, sparkling DUAL 1 TERABYTE drives. Overly cautious? Perhaps, but I learned a lesson. A very valuable lesson.

Give The Geek A Chance.

the perfect jean

I'm not an overly fashionable person. I mean, I LIKE fashion. I like to think if TLC showed up at my door, I could totally rock it shopping with Stacy and Clinton. But, I have a hard time shelling out the big bucks on clothes for myself. I've been known to drop insane amounts of money on clothes for my kids (please don't mention any of this to my Money Manager because I will totally deny it). But I don't do it for myself.

When it comes to getting dressed in the morning, I go for Old Navy jeans, schumpy t-shirts and Target flats almost every day. I KNOW that I SHOULD put on accessories and wear a real shirt but I just don't care. I don't make time to iron. I throw everything in the washer and then the dryer without a second thought.

The other day I came in to work to find a bonus sitting at my desk. It isn't the first time it has happened but I guess I figured I didn't deserve much of a bonus since I've been pregnant/nursing/on maternity leave for like the last three years. I apparently have them totally fooled which: AWESOME.

I thought about buying a new camera body because honestly free money doesn't happen very often and I could easily cash and spend the check without my Money Manager getting his little mitts on my prize. But, I'm just not sure I've outgrown my Rebel. And, would I just buy the new Rebel and would it even be any better? Or a more advanced camera? Do I need an advanced camera to take mediocre shots of my kids? I just don't know.

I remember a post that someone posted a while back, could have sworn it was FatJ but she has assured me over email that it wasn't her, where the blogger was looking for advice on a nice pair of jeans. You know, an investment pair of jeans. Jeans that I can wear to Bunco and not feel like a fat schlumpy cow with saggy jeans that have too much stretch in them that they don't hold their shape. I can't find the post now so I'm asking you.

1. Where does one go to buy nice jeans?
2. Do I really have to hang them up to dry or are there magic jeans somewhere that I can put in the dryer that won't fade/shrink?
3. Are nice jeans really THAT much better? I mean we're talking about like five or six TIMES as much.
4. Do they really make nice jeans for short, fat kids? Because I'm 5'2".

a new home, a new life

Holy crap, DEEP BREATH. It's the first deep breath I've taken in weeks.  

I'd love to post a picture of our new house but I didn't take any. Which, just so you know, will annoy the crap out of me like forever. I wanted to do before and after pictures but you know, it just didn't happen. I also wanted to clean the bathrooms before I gave my kids a bath and that didn't happen either.

Let's say it all together now: EWWWWWW.

I'd also love to post pictures of the home we left behind but the computer isn't even set up yet. And I can't remember if I even took any because I can hardly remember my name.

Also: Where is my camera? I haven't seen that thing in days.

We do finally have the washer and dryer working now so there's that. And I even had a clean towel to use to shower with this morning so we are definitely moving up in the world.

It was a crazy weekend but thanks to our parents and sisters, we did it. My mom and dad worked like slaves for DAYS and I'm not sure I will ever get over the guilt of watching my daddy hauling load after load after LOAD of our stuff from one house to the other. I thought moving would be easy because we hired movers. I was SO TOTALLY WRONG. My mom cleaned both houses, my mom and sister Jen packed everything and my mom and sister Annie unpacked everything. Ski's parents had the kids. Honestly, moving sucks and we would have been in BIG TROUBLE without all of their help.

Renee stepped right in to her new life like it was no big thing, demanding Dora and wanting to feed her new pet (a beta fish) every fifteen seconds. She is tickled that the fish is sleeping in her new room. She didn't miss a beat really until last night when we went for a walk in the stroller and she was all kinds of pissed off that there is no playground two blocks up the road. She kept saying "I don't see it Mommy, I can't find the playground anywhere."

He Who Doesn't Sleep had a good night followed by a TERRIBLE one so it's pretty safe to say that he wasn't really affected by it either.

I didn't get to say goodbye to my old house in the chaos but I can say that I haven't missed it yet. It is so wonderful to have so much extra space. I actually have cupboards that don't have anything in them! Can you imagine the awesomeness? I think we'll love it once I get it de-beiged because the lady that we bought it from replaced all of the carpet and had the ENTIRE HOUSE painted beige. The Beige just isn't us so we will be embarking on Operation De-Beige in the very near future. Like, as soon as I have the strength in my body to hold a paint brush.

There is enough work to do to keep us busy and we'll make it ours but most of it is cosmetic and can wait until we have time

Translation: It can wait until our children are old enough to not be so damned NEEDY. Which, at this rate, may happen in about the year 2020.

I hope.